Wednesday, February 15, 2012

The Bed Making (or lack there of) Incident

My husband and I first placed our house on the market last spring and took it back off at the end of summer with the intentions of giving it another try near the end of winter. We really do love our house but the down fall is that we currently live about 45-50 minutes away from our restaurant. As our boys get older and become involved with sports and other activities, we began to feel the need to move closer to allow us to have more time together as a family.  I never realized just how difficult it is to actually sell your house. I know what you are thinking, of course it is, we have been bombarded by television and newspapers... about the housing market slump. This is not what I am referring to. I am talking about the actual process of placing your house on the market. For me, this includes completing all of these tasks with two active boys, a 70lb dog and a husband who is rarely home.

Our house will be going back on the market shortly and I never quite realized how much extra work I was going to create for myself by selling our home. In a nutshell, I think I have bitten off more than I can chew. My days last time were spent not only taking care of 2 boys, a dog and a fish, may he rest in peace, (which can be exhausting in and of itself) but inspecting windows for fingerprints and dog nose smudges, coercing everyone to use the same shower everyday to limit what I will have to psychotically clean in case of a potential showing, and searching for every kitchen appliance in my cupboards that I had hidden and tucked away so my kitchen appeared "more spacious". If we were lucky, when we had a showing we would maybe get a few hours notice. However, the norm most often then not, was about 1 hour from the time we received a phone until the time the potential buyer would show up.

As we get ready to give it the "ole college try" again, I will share with you a little story from our last attempt at "preparing" our house to go on the market. Is goes a little something like this...

After spending an entire week compulsively cleaning and de-cluttering my house as every article and website said I should do, the time had come for the photographer to come and take the pictures. Every room in the house was ready. The floors were spick and span, the windows were crystal clear, there was not a crumb, strand of dog hair or piece of dirt to be found anywhere and I had succeeded in keeping the house this way for a full 12 hours leading up to the photographer's arrival. (It really is the little things you come to appreciate when you are a mom, can I get an AMEN.) Everything went well, or so I thought, until I received a phone call while out to lunch with my Grandmother a few days later. Apparently, the photographs of our Master Bedroom and Bathroom were not sufficient and the photographer was standing outside my house trying to get in to retake them. In a panic I called my husband, who was currently sleeping in our Master Bedroom, to wake up, make the bed and let the photographer in. If this were a movie, this is where it would cut to me specifically telling my husband "to make the bed and make sure the mattress is not showing". I arrived at the house about an hour later to find my husband leisurely drinking his coffee. As I come into the house, he is quick to tell me that "he made the bed good, but not quite as good as when I make it." I relax, thinking that he probably just didn't arrange the throw pillows as I would have. No big deal, I think to myself.

A few hours later, I casually stroll to our bedroom, where I was horrified to find his version of "making the bed good". For starters, both sides of our mattress were showing because the comforter was on the bed the wrong way and needed to be turned an additional 90 degrees to fit properly. I asked how he didn't realize the comforter wasn't on right, his response "I thought it was a square". Uh, did you not notice the four extra feet of comforter you were shoving down the top and the bottom of the bed? I then ask him "But I told you to make sure the mattress wasn't showing". His response "the top of the mattress isn't showing". Obviously the top of the mattress wouldn't be showing, silly me, I should of specifically stated that I didn't want ANY of the mattress showing.  Next up, the pillows on the bed. While I was able to appreciate his attempt to arrange our throw pillows, I was boggled by the fact that there were 4 king size pillows missing from our bed. So I asked, "why did you not put the rest of the pillows on the bed, and where are they?" His response "I got confused and I couldn't figure out how to arrange them, so I hid them in our closet" Come again? You own and run an entire restaurant but you were confused by an additional 4 pillows on our bed. I ended the conversation in an attempt to protect my sanity and explained that I hoped he had enjoyed the extra 2 minutes he saved by not making the bed properly and not to worry, because next time I will just make sure our 6 year old makes the bed because he knows the difference between a square and a rectangle and he tends to not be "overwhelmed" by pillows.

Exhibit A - Proper Bed Making

Exhibit B - Failed Attempt at Bed Making

I rest my case...

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